Opening up about addiction can be one of the most difficult things you’ll do in your life. While recognising you are living with addiction is a huge step that takes a great deal of bravery and courage, we can often feel ashamed, guilty and incredibly vulnerable too.
Whether suffering from drug addiction, alcohol abuse or enduring battles with gambling or even social media, getting the help you need is vital, but at the same time reaching out to friends, family and even colleagues can be a powerful step towards healing, connection and acceptance of the issue at hand.
It’s a difficult conversation to have, but one that can be instrumental in you getting the support from others that you need. So, if you’ve recognised that you’re living with addiction, here’s some insight on what to do when it comes to reaching out and telling people…
Choose the Right People
Not everyone needs to know about your addiction and not everyone will respond in the way you might hope. Choose people who are likely to offer support, compassion, and respect. This might be a close friend, a family member, a partner, or even a trusted colleague.
Start with someone you feel emotionally safe with. You can gradually widen the circle of people you share with, but there’s no pressure to tell everyone straight away.
Pick the Right Time and Setting
Timing matters. Try to have the conversation in a quiet, private space where you won’t be rushed or interrupted. Avoid bringing it up in the middle of an argument, social event, or stressful moment.
Let the person know that you’d like to talk about something important and ask if they have time to really listen. Creating the right environment can help both of you feel calmer and more open.
Be Honest, But Set Boundaries
You don’t have to share every detail, especially if you’re not ready. Focus on what you feel comfortable revealing. You might say:
“I want to be honest with you, I’m living with an addiction, and I’m working hard to get help.”
Alternatively, you might say:
“I’ve been struggling with [substance/behaviour], and I’ve decided it’s time to be open about it.”
It’s perfectly okay to say that you’re still figuring things out. You can also set boundaries around questions you’re not ready to answer or topics you don’t wish to discuss.
Be Prepared for Different Reactions
People react in different ways, some will be supportive and compassionate, while others may be surprised, upset, or unsure of what to say. Remember, their reaction is not a reflection of your worth.
Some people may need time to process the information. Others might not understand addiction or might hold outdated views. If that happens, try not to take it personally. You are sharing something deeply personal, and that takes strength, no matter how it’s received.
Ask for the Support You Need
If you’re telling someone because you’d like their support, be specific about how they can help. Do you want them to simply listen? Check in on you? Come with you to a support group? Help you avoid triggers? Offer to take you to a rehabilitation centre in Surrey?
Letting people know how they can be there for you not only helps them respond better, but also empowers you to take control of your recovery journey.
Be Kind to Yourself
Talking about addiction can bring up feelings of shame, guilt, or fear but remember, addiction is an illness, not a moral failing. You’re not alone, and many others have walked a similar path. So be kind to yourself. Seeking support and being honest about your struggles is a sign of strength, not weakness.
If the first conversation doesn’t go as hoped, don’t give up. You deserve to be heard and supported. You might also benefit from talking to a counsellor or attending a support group such as Narcotics Anonymous, Alcoholics Anonymous, or SMART Recovery, where others understand exactly what you’re going through.
